Well Thursday is coffee day. We're supposed to meet and have coffee...get to know each other. I want to get to know her, she seems interesting...but sometimes I miss my old friends, my old life.
I've tried going back though and I'm just not that person anymore. It made me ill to even try to fit into that mold.
She's exciting though. A Buddhist, sexy, involved in so many causes and things I would never dream of. So outgoing...but who knows if we even have anything in common. I guess we'll see.
I feel like such a fraud sometimes though. Just fat and insecure and incapable of a real emotion. I can't even interest my own husband. Why do I think a woman would be any different?
I don't even know if I really care. Really...all I want is my husband...I want him to want me...I don't know as I have any great yearning for another woman. I'm not adverse to it and I've long ago got over any religious problems with it...maybe I'm scared I'll really enjoy it...right now I would just enjoy anyone's touch frankly.
I never thought life would be like this. I sometimes wonder if I'm being punished...
Hey Castlekeeper! Proud to be the first to comment on your blog! I just wanted to thank you for visiting my blog and leaving your comment. I appreciate it very much.
ReplyDeleteI think it's an excellent therapy to have a blog. You can rant as much as you like. That's always good.
I follow a very interesting blog on happiness. Maybe you've seen it but if you haven't it might do you good. It's called the happiness project and it's written by Gretchen Rubin.
http://www.happiness-project.com/
Thanks again and hope you feel better tomorrow.
xoxo